10 Ways to a Happier, Healthier YOU!

Sometimes, it seems that good is never good enough. There are days when I feel like a failure of a parent where I can’t manage to keep up…trying to avoid drowning in the daily struggles that arise. Many of us, including myself, live life at such a rapid pace, trying to squeeze as much as we possibly can into our schedule.
This comes from the desire to be more productive, efficient, successful.

I want to cross everything off my checklist by day’s end.
I want to be more efficient with my time.
I want my hard work to pay off.
I want to DO. IT. ALL. But, I step back at certain moments and think to myself, “Am I actually
enjoying all of this? Or, am I simply going through the motions??

This type of lifestyle can easily create feelings of discontentment, and slowly, we begin to feel more unfulfilled. Living in a dog eat dog type of world creates this pressure to prove yourself to those around you and the need to measure up to our friends, coworkers, neighbors…anyone, really. Soon, I find myself determining my self-worth based on the opinions of others. I try to live up to the expectations and standards of those around me and life soon becomes a competition.

Since entering my 30’s and becoming a mom, my perspective on what it means to live a happy and healthy life has changed a bit. I used to view “health and happiness” primarily from a physical standpoint. Ya know, the more I exercise, eat nutritiously, drink water, and get enough sleep, the more I will feel good about myself and pleased with the person I am. In turn, I will be happier.

If only it boiled down to these few things.

Yes…physical health is good to keep in mind, but I now realize how often I overlooked the importance of staying mentally fit and emotionally strong.
These are just as vital to your happiness as physical wellness.

Each new stage of life will bring about lessons, ones that are challenging, yet purposeful. They help you grow to become a better version of yourself. In the past few years, there have been 10 ways that have allowed me to be a happier and healthier person!

(Image courtesy of StockImages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

1. LAUGH AT YOURSELF

Life WILL throw some serious curveballs. You can fully expect to experience some twists and turns during this thing we call LIFE. The important thing to remember is to try and laugh along the way. As I’ve learned from my dad, who has endured a lot of hardship over the years with Type 1 Diabetes, you’ve got to roll with the punches and be able to laugh at yourself. Don’t take life TOO seriously. We all have things about ourselves that we wish we could change or improve. But, don’t forget to honor what makes you different and celebrate your quirks. We all have them. Try and strive to be authentic over being accepted.

2. QUIT COMPARING

It’s so easy to ASSUME that other people have it better than you. Social media paints a really distorted picture of reality, allowing us to feel inferior, incapable, or inadequate in many areas of life. The more we size ourselves up to people, the more we are robbed of the simple joys in life. Focus on what you DO have and be thankful for those blessings. Someone you are comparing your life to may have it harder.

3. STOP JUSTIFYING / MAKING EXCUSES

Being a perfectionist, I always find myself with a litany of reasons as to why I didn’t do this or that. I can rationalize like crazy. But the truth of the matter is, no one will pursue my dreams for me. You’ve just got to START, as my husband often reminds me. Worry about the “what ifs” later…. or the potential bumps in the road that may or MAY NOT appear. You can’t always prepare for everything in life. The longer you wait to get going, the more excuses you will make. It’s easy to justify your behaviors or create reasons for why certain things did or didn’t happen, but it’s important to take charge of this short life. We all have the chance to make it noteworthy and meaningful.

4. FORGIVE

Much easier said than done, I know. It’s a very hard thing to do. Forgiveness can free you from the tight grasp that negativity has on you. Holding a grudge will wear you out and weigh you down over time. Without even noticing or realizing it, you may begin to harbor bitterness, have resentment, and become numb to certain feelings. Trust me, forgiveness may not feel warranted. You very easily could think, “What good will come of it…what’s the use?” Regardless of who was at fault, you carry the burden too, as long as you hold onto it. When we forgive, we empower ourselves and let go of all the negative energy that takes over. Over time, you will be much happier when you do.

5. MAKE TIME / PRIORITIZE

There are 24 hours in a day, plain and simple. Without even realizing it, work overtakes our lives and we look back wondering how time escaped us so quickly. We WISH we would have been more adventurous…more spontaneous. The thing is, you can….as long as you prioritize and make the time. It really is a matter of priorities and what you value. Some things must be given up in order to live the life you envision. Little by little, you can make small changes that will have a big impact. Indulge in a hobby, take a class on something that interests you, read a book, take time for yourself, plan a vacation….or heck, even just a date night. Our days are limited. When you get to the end of the road, you’ll want to look back and feel like you made the most out of them! Think….how are you spending your time?

6. BUILD OTHERS UP

A compliment can go a LONG way (as long as it is genuine, of course)! Remember the imprint that words leave on people, both positively and negatively. Still to this day, I will never forget when I heard the shorty story, NAILS IN THE FENCE. The main lesson being that you can put a knife in a man and draw it out. But, it won’t matter how many times you say I’m sorry, the wound is still there. No one likes to feel judged or scrutinized. Do your best to avoid gossiping with those around you. Stop criticizing and picking apart the things someone does wrong….but rather, recognize something they do right. Our words have tremendous impact on others. The simplest thing you can do each day is to build someone up and encourage them. Be sincere. Be thoughtful. Be the person that uplifts instead of putting someone else down. It’s incredible the love someone feels when you pay them a kind word or two.

7. STOP REMINISCING OR REGRETTING

Change is an essential part of life. Whether deemed good or bad, it will happen. Stop beating yourself up for missed opportunities or mistakes you’ve made. You live and you learn! At one time or another, we’ve all had the thought, “Well, in hindsight, I should have seen it coming. I should have known.” But, no one is perfect. The more you dwell on feelings of regret, the less likely you are able to enjoy the present moment. Maybe it’s not regret that holds you captive, but instead you reminisce about the happier moments in life. You recount instances when things seemed easier and life was simpler, less hectic. Reminiscing doesn’t help you appreciate what you have here and now. During hard times, reminiscing makes us feel temporarily better. It’s like sticking a bandaid on a wound. Focus on what lies ahead and how you can be happy in the present. No looking back!

8. TAKE CHANCES / RISKS

Speaking from the master (me), it is really easy to let fear take control of your life. The fear of failure….the fear of judgment…..the fear of not reaching your full potential….the fear of striking out….the list goes on. Sometimes I convince myself that I can’t do something before I even try. But, how will I ever know? It’s important to step out of your comfort zone and try something new. Becoming a creature of habit limits you. Break the monotony and venture out into the world, even if it’s one tiny step at a time. One of my favorite quotes is by author, Paulo Coelho, and it says, “If you think adventure is dangerous, try routine, it is lethal.” A life that is predictable confines you and stifles creativity. Yes, I admit….it can be scary as hell to take a chance on something, especially if it leaves you feeling uncertain and skeptical. The planner in me always tells me NO, but as I get older, I realize how much I’m missing out on when I don’t step out on a limb and take some chances.

9. ENGAGE

This one is probably the most important on this list. As a society, we are no longer interacting with one another. Social media has taken over our lives and consumes our free time. Email and text messages are the “go to” way to communicate. Sadly, we are so disengaged with everyone around us and relationships are suffering because of it. Turn off your phone. Grab a cup of coffee with someone. Be an active listener. Let go of the need to know what everyone else is doing and LIVE your life! I am certainly guilty of this myself and need to be reminded often of the importance of this lesson. We have to show our children what it looks like to pay attention when it matters, to look people in the eyes, and ENGAGE!

10. LEARN TO SAY NO

You really can’t do it all, no matter how hard you try. Most of my life, I’ve been a people pleaser….trying to make sure everyone was happy in some way. I tried my very best to attend every event I could, mainly guided by the fear of missing out on something. Other times, I felt like I could complete more than I was capable….resulting in disappointment and feeling discouraged. I wanted to say YES to everything and everybody. If someone asked for my help, I couldn’t decline. If someone wanted to hang out, it was too hard to pass up. But, you stretch yourself too thin. You wear yourself out. Focus on quality over quantity. Sometimes, you have to learn to say NO to people, to opportunities, and to tempting offers. It’ll help you get more out of life!

By no means am I implying that I do all of these things consistently. I simply strive to make them a part of my daily life. Slowly but surely, as I focus on these 10 things, I find myself more content and satisfied with where I am!Is there anything you would add to this list that you have found has led to a happier, healthier version of you? Please share! I would love to hear.